My Box

The moment of peeking. My mind seems to be so abusive.My heart cant win over with it. Sometimes it is better to treat yourself as being so stupid.Being so stupid as always..Because your heart keeps on pounding, beating, and caring for someone. Sometimes its worth is not enough to satisfy its meaning. There's a lot of meaning around us. When you are inside a box for a long time and you try to peak for a moment to be aware..you would see the best and the worst part of the environment. You will feel the caress of air every night, the longing for something you do not have, and you will feel that you have nothing except from the innate nature around you. By feeling those desired and undesired thoughts, the traumatic event seems to be always waiting for you to come. Until keeping inside the box is the only way to satisfy yourself and to keep yourself from feeling those traumatic events. Being inside the box is the only way to help yourself, to live life without worries.So from now, after ending the futile conversation and after peeking from the edges of my box, I must come to the point wherein I should close it and keep it from longing. Keep myself from being so stubborn, stupid, worthless, aggressive, and submissive. I must keep my box close until one day someone will open it and carry me from inside out. Letting me realize the beauty of outside, the beauty of the environment, the caress of air and the worth of life..So I must stop peeking. I must keep my box close as long as possible.. I must never try to open it all by myself...